Happy Birthday Tom

Yesterday was (or would have been) my father-in-law's birthday. I knew the day was coming and it would be hard for Mike. I want to be there for him and let him cry if he needs to, or talk about his Dad if that feels right. The problem is I have no idea what he feels or how it hurts to loose a parent. I haven't done that yet. I am so thankful that I can't relate, but I wish I had a better understanding so I could know how to support him better. Is it better to bring it up and start talking about him or do I make sure not to mention his name at all? So not knowing what to do, I did what I do best, I baked. I know it doesn't actually help with the pain, and its probably not the best coping method, but its all I know how to do. So Tom, this apple pie is for you. We miss you so much!